Lady Justice Sucker-Punched

Okay, one more pathetic Paris post. First, I request the work days on my time card be calculated on Paris' Five for Three plan. Credit for 120 hours with only 76 on the books. Sweet! Also in the Paris Prison Package for Delicate Guests: visits from private psychologist, reversing judge's order for no house arrest and the very best feature, precedent for prison stress warranting release! Any takers on that one? I'm guessing a few hundred thousand. (Yes, yes, I know - she wasn't released. She was reassigned. And Andrew Speaker just has a chest cold.)

A plea to newscasters and 'investigative reporters' everywhere: Please, no more speculation on whether this experience of doing time has changed Paris or not. Paris is not going to be an advocate for stressed out inmates, donate millions to MADD or stop making money for just being. Paris is chilling at home eating cupcakes. Yes, that's hot! It's a steaming bag of pile.